Bordeline Personality Disorder

I am doing this blog in the hopes of helping people with "BPD" and to help family and friends and those who do not have BPD to perhaps understand us better. Also to learn from others at the same time. I am 36 years old and I was diagnosed with BPD about 2 years ago. I am fortunate enough to be in a fantastic treatment center for 2 years and i know that depending on where people live, many places do not have treatment at all. I will be sharing VERY PERSONAL information because i think it is important people understand and in the hopes that my story can help someone who has felt the same or went through similar experiences, hopefully they can relate. I would like to share experiences and things I have learned in therapy and hear people's stories and experiences. Please do not self diagnose yourself if you find you have many of the symptoms of Borderline personality disorder. I also am not a doctor or therapist so everything I post is from my own experiences and what I have learned so far about BPD. Everyone is welcome to share their stories, offer tips and such but if anyone is disrespectful I will remove your posts. I hope this will be a way to inform and help people including myself. Thank you

Friday 2 September 2011

why?

1:33 in the am...cant sleep. I feel happy and nervous. With bpd it is so deeply rooted that we think we are bad people and that things dont go well...and right now things are going very well, i feel very good, very scary, i keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, its as if its too good to be true. Usually when i feel this way, i jump into one of my compulsions and unconsciously make things go bad before it happens, so it doesnt suprise me when it comes. The trick i am now learning in therapy is to recognize this and try not to jump into a compulsion by doing something positive...easier said then done. Takes A LOT of practice. Why do we believe we dont deserve happiness or believe things should not go well?

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